Isaias Crow - Muralist - Speaker -Writer
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The Crow's Aura" (Page 48)

6/26/2014

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I suggest you observe the situation at hand, understand what it is that the situation is trying to teach you then respond to that situation with clarity,” Eight said.

I was upset. I was in no state of mind to be taking any type of advice from him or anybody.

“Look, you are about to confront your mother and your entire family. You are going to explain to them that you need their help in another realm. How do think they are going to respond to that? The first thing they are all going to think is that you’re on drugs or that you’re going insane. That is why it is of key importance that you understand what I am saying so you can be prepared and most importantly – clear to deliver the message,” Eight said without emotion.

“How do I get rid of my emotions? I am like a time bomb ticking away and waiting for the right moment to explode,” I said as I began to weep.

“I can’t tell you the “how” because that varies from person to person. In other words, there is no particular formula to do this right. What I can tell you is, start by observing yourself – without judgment and without trying to change your thoughts. This will help you understand how you think, what thoughts travel through your mind on a constant basis. At that point, you can see for yourself what you feel is true to you and what is not. But you need to self-introspect and self-analyze – this would be my first suggestion since nobody is going to do it for you,” Eight said.

As we were speaking, I lost total focus and now we were driving by the mountains.

“Pull over right here at this scenic view point,” Eight said. “I need some time to take in some fresh air by myself,” he said.

“That makes two of us,” Thirty-Six said.

I pulled over and they both got out of the car. I looked away for a moment to gather my thoughts. As I was about to lash out at Eight with judgments and my anger, I looked back – they were both gone.

I sat in my car gazing over the streets of El Paso. In the far distance, I could see the mountainous roads of Juarez, Mexico. Both spaces were divided by a fictional line just as I was. I looked around in hopes of blaming somebody for my anger and emotional distress. I was alone. I began to observe my thoughts as Eight had previously suggested. After an hour of introspection, I saw it clearly – “It’s me, I’m to blame. There’s nobody else left to point the finger at but me.”

For the first time ever in my life, I wept out of joy. I had come to a bold realization - the mind if not taken care of properly and up-kept with goodness will program itself with negativity and poison. Some of the things the Voice feeds off of. 


                                                                                                             Page 48
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    The Crow's Aura

    Autobiographic/Fictional Story  of a phase in my life, that I am writing 1 page a day till its completion. 

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